Last week, I had dinner with an ex-girlfriend, a bitter-sweet and generally delightful occasion, after which she gave me a little book. Not only is she very charming but she is also particularly intelligent so it was with trepidation that I read the title, “The Question Book”.
A wave of relief swept over me since, as a coach, it is what I spend a lot of my time doing – asking questions. As any five-year old will tell you it is easy to ask questions, especially when they start with ‘why’. So why do people come and talk to me, or any coach for that matter? They come because they have a problem and they want help with that. Many of my clients have great expertise, are very intelligent and have wonderfully supportive colleagues and friends. Unsurprisingly, some of these friends also have very good answers, yet they still have their problem. So what do they get from coming to me? Do I really just ask a better question? I think that it is more than this; it is a combination of things such as being objective and listening for different things. I am sure that it also helps, if only in saving time, that I have a personal understanding of the “City” financial market place, building businesses and rather more than ten years coaching financial professionals. Having first entered the City in 1978, I have seen a great deal of change from the old jobber’s pitches on the floor of the Stock Exchange, through open outcry in Liffe to the modern electronic trading systems. I have also seen what has stayed constant especially the greed and the fear as markets go through their boom to bust cycles and back again. All in all, this experience with my very significant coach training not only helps me to generate options and new ideas but also to get some perspective too. Then there is knowing the time to challenge and the time to shut up! Many clients have told me how helpful I have been in getting them to re-analyse their situations and find better ways forward.
What with the current financial turmoil, the stress as investment banks in particular cut jobs and the pressure from the boss it is hardly surprising that we don’t think about ourselves and rarely give thought to either our longer term career or, perhaps, even time to think about what we need to be doing differently to be more effective now. This is where my coaching is really useful; helping you think through the issues in new ways; turning the ‘boss from hell’ into your ‘new best friend’ or defining a medium term strategy for you and then putting it all into an action plan. Many people have come to me to change jobs but have ended up being promoted and getting back on track with their old firm which has saved them all sorts of risk. Make sure that being busy and intelligent is for your benefit, not just the company’s. If any of this resonates, give me a call on 020 7987 7080.
Now, where was I? Oh yes, the ex and the book. It wasn’t the title that made me shudder; it was the subtitle, “What Makes You Tick”. What was she alluding to…?